Antonio Ware

Antonio Ware knows what it’s like to have society define him only through his past mistakes. Growing up in Dayton, Ohio, with his mother, Antonio didn’t have a father of his own.

“My mom did the best she could, but all boys need their father,” Antonio said.

Antonio turned to other role models—people who led him to make some poor decisions.

“I didn’t know what to do. At that moment I wish somebody had spoken up. I felt the need to protect my family. Nobody was hurt, but I paid the consequences,” he said, alluding to a crime he committed as a young adult.

At 19, Antonio was sent to prison, and according to him, he messed up his life early on.

Though Antonio still has a felony on his record, he said he doesn’t let that mistake define him and a said good heart can go a long way.

“If you’re living a mistake, it will become your identity,” he said. “Mistakes don’t define us: It’s our character, not our record. I believe that character is more important than our mistakes. Have good morals—and if you made a mistake, even if it’s in the past, work toward showing the world how you really are.”

In December 2021, Antonio moved to Columbia, MO, to be with his current spouse and mother of his two youngest children, a 2-year-old daughter and an 8-month-old son. Right now, fatherhood is Antonio’s greatest priority.

“Being there for them, spending time with them, teaching them,” he said. “Being a good father is my purpose in life right now. It means everything to me.”

Antonio has a third child, an 18-year-old with whom Antonio is currently no-contact. This is not uncommon for dads who receive Good Dads services, and a father’s endeavor to be involved in the lives of his children is not always linear. But through the Good Dads program, Antonio has learned a lot. He said he appreciates how the classes he attended teaches communication skills, and he’s especially benefitted from the course’s advice for communicating with kids as they get older.

“Good Dads helped me by helping with different stages of life and ages of the kids,” he said. “I learned from their experiences and talked about their situation. I learned a lot of communication techniques with Good Dads, not just with kids but with my spouse as well.”

Because of the mistakes he made early in life, Antonio said he’s still paying the consequences, even now at 42 years old. With a felony on his record, finding employment hasn’t been the easiest, and he got laid off from his previous job. That’s where Love Columbia came in handy.

Antonio went to the nonprofit for career coaching and rent assistance due after his layoff. It was there that he learned about the Good Dads program and was asked if he wanted to attend. He jumped at the opportunity, figuring the more help, the better.

Now having graduated from the Good Dads, Antonio said he’s reaped ample benefits from the program, including a new support system. He cherishes the relationships that he’s built in the class, and he’s grateful to both Love Columbia and Good Dads.

“I feel like I can call (my mentors at these nonprofits) if I have any problems,” he said. “It’s good to have that. It’s a blessing with the relationships that were built through the program.”

In addition to a support system, Antonio feels more confident as a whole.

Some of his favorite aspects of the program are “the confidence building that you get from it, knowing that I’m not alone, and the feeling of trying and learning more about being a good dad and feeling confident that you are a good dad,” he said.

“Most of the time you go through fatherhood without being called a good dad,” he admitted. “My wife tells me that I’m a good dad … it’s knowing that you’re taking the steps to be a good dad that matter.”

July 31st, 2024, marked an important day in Antonio’s life. After completing both Good Dads 2.0 and the Within My Reach courses, Antonio graduated from the program, certifying that he is taking more conscious steps to be a more active father in the lives of his children.

For us at Good Dads, the smile on Antonio’s face during the graduation ceremony at Love Columbia says it all!

To fathers out there who may be struggling, Antonio suggests not to handle it alone.

“Don’t be afraid to ask for help,” he said. “Don’t think that nobody is going to help you. Realize you’re not by yourself. You might put on a strong face, but I learned a lot of things from asking for help.”

Through the Good Dads program, Antonio has learned the importance of fathers in a child’s life.

“I believe being a good dad leads to a good representation of yourself,” he said. “It’s important to pass on the knowledge we learn in our lives, teach (kids) and guide them. Fathers are important in the development of children. (I) want to leave a good legacy by being a good dad. Children have a purpose on this earth, and being a good father will help them live out their purpose by making sure they have someone.”

Now that he’s graduated from the program, Antonio said he has big goals for his future. He wants to prioritize being a good dad by helping others, saying there are benefits to helping people.

Antonio says he’ll be “stepping into fatherhood with more confidence and the tools I didn’t have before.”

“I let people know about Love Columbia and the Good Dads program. I appreciate all their help. (They) gave me a purpose. (They) make you want to help others and help bring more confidence. (They) gave me more ambition to point myself in the right direction.”

About the Author

Dora Gilreath is the communications assistant at Good Dads. She joined the team in 2024 and is pursuing a Bachelor’s degree in journalism and a minor in creative writing at Missouri State University. She loves reading, writing and anything related to theater.