José Torres

Fathers play an important role in the lives of their children. For New Pathways graduate and father of four José Torres, he admitted that, at first, he “had the wrong idea” when it came to fatherhood.

“I thought my role was to provide, make sure they had food, clothes and a home, and that’s about it,” he admitted.

But his views have since evolved. Since his involvement in Good Dads, José has gained several insights from the New Pathways for Good Dads program, including communication skills and advice from fellow fathers taking the class.

“(Good Dads) made a huge impact in my life,” he said. “The things I felt were missing as a dad, I got them there.”

Before Good Dads, José admitted his life “was a mess.” Struggling with drug addiction, he said being a dad wasn’t his top priority at the time.

“I was so involved with when I was going to get my next drug, I was putting myself first, and being selfish,” he said. “I was there, but I wasn’t really there.”

After José’s release from prison in summer 2024, his boss at the time suggested he look into the Good Dads program in the Lebanon area. LifePoint Church collaborated with the Good Dads Lebanon chapter to offer classroom space for fatherhood classes. She said it would be a chance for a fresh start.

The Good Dads Lebanon chapter encourages and empowers families and strengthens the community through positive fatherly involvement at home. For José, he learned a lot of positive lessons from the Good Dads program, including consistency and meeting the needs of your children.

It was during Good Dads classes that his views about fatherhood—his role, impact and participation—started to change. He learned that children need emotional support and quality time from their fathers in order to succeed.

José said that during his addiction, he didn’t cherish the little moments spent with his kids. Often, he’d go to work, come home, and not pay a lot of attention to his kiddos, telling them to go to their mother if they wanted something.

The difference between José then and José now is like night and day.

Now, he enjoys playing with his kids, taking them to fun places like the park and McDonald’s, and even having a family game night every week. When he gets home from work, he asks them about their day and spends quality time with them.

“It’s amazing the change that you see in your kids,” he said. “Before, they wouldn’t approach me. They felt like they were walking on eggshells.

“Now, they see a change, and they tell me often,” he continued. “I hear them saying, ‘He’s a good dad;’ ‘Dad, we love you,’ and I get to feel that love. It’s amazing.”

An important lesson José learned from the Good Dads program was the speaker/listener technique. He admitted that he and his wife used to argue often. There was a lot of yelling, and not a lot of progress was made towards solving problems. Through the speaker/listener technique, both parties can take the time to really understand one another. He also said that the technique has helped him through his anger issues.

“Now (my wife) knows I’m paying attention,” he said. “If there’s any issue, we get to talk about it.”

An aspect of regularly attending classes that José appreciated was being surrounded by fellow fathers. They provided advice, pointers, and tips and tricks to try in the future with his kids. It made him feel less alone on his journey.

“I think you benefit from other parents, just like they benefit from you,” he said.

For men who are beginning their fatherhood success journeys, José strongly recommends the program. There is a variety of information for dads in different situations, as well as different perspectives from fellow classmates. Regardless of the age of your children or your relationship status, Good Dads is there to help.

“There’s nothing to lose, but there’s a lot to gain,” he said, “and if you really want to be part of your kid’s life, you should take this class. You will not regret it.”

José graduated from the New Pathways program in summer 2025, one year after his release from prison. What a difference just one year makes! His wife and children were in the audience as he walked to the front of the room, shook the hands of Good Dads’ staff and held his graduation certificate for the first time. Receiving that recognition made him feel so accomplished.

Now enjoying post-grad life, José continues being a present father for his kiddos, admiring each of them for their differing qualities. From playing chess with his oldest son to giving 10-minute hugs to his youngest daughter, who he affectionately calls “sugar pie,” José continues to utilize lessons from the New Pathways program on how to be a good dad.

“Anybody can be a father,” he said, “But being a dad, it takes time, it takes consistency and it takes effort. It’s an everyday thing.”

About the Author

Dora Gilreath is the communications assistant at Good Dads. She joined the team in 2024 and has a Bachelor’s degree in journalism and a minor in creative writing at Missouri State University. She loves reading, writing and anything related to theater.